Mexico’s president Felipe Calderon, the queen of England, and ex-U.S. president, George W. Bush were sharing a ride late at night when their car ran out of gas. Not wanting to leave the Queen alone, Calderon and Bush decided it best to get out and all walk together to the only house in the area that still had a light on.

Walking towards the house, the Calderon and Bush, both wanting to prove worthey of the damsel in distress, began to argue over who would make the call for assistance and to what country they should try first. Queen Elizabeth, the smart woman she is, settled the dispute by suggesting they each make a call to their own country, besides, she needed to inform security of her whereabouts.

After ringing the doorbell, and waiting what seemed enternity, they were caught of guard to find the devil, himself, had answered the door. Smiling and courteous, Satan welcomed them into his home and offered his personal assistance.

G.W., with his Texan drawl, was the first to speak: ‘Mr. Satan, I wonder if you might lend me your telephone so I can call the Secret Service and request gas for Queenie’s car.’ to which the Devil cheerfully replied: Well, Hell ya, Georgie, the only thing is, you all will have to pay me for the calls.

George made his call, spoke for roughly 20 minutes and turned to the Devil to ask ‘What do I owe ya Satan’ to which the Devil replied, ‘Twenty minutes, of long distance, you owe me $20,000 U.S. dollars’. Thinking the tariff was rather steep, but not wanting to piss off the Prince of Darkness, Bush paid and passed the phone to the Queen.

Within 10 minutes, the queen had called Buckingham Palace, assured them all help was on the way, and requested her bill from the Devil. Taking out a calculator, the devil ran the numbers and announced; ‘10 minutes charging international rate, you owe me $35,000 euros, your Royal Highness’.

The last one to call for assistance was President Calderon. Six calls were lost to Telmex service failure and 3 calls to Los Pinos government offices were unable to be connected as their phone services had been suspended due to lack of payment, finally, on the last attempt, he was connected to his Chief of Security.

‘We’ve got a situation and I need a strategy, pronto. Get the troops, all of them from Juarez to Michoacan, here on the double.’

As he hung up the phone and feeling nervous about the cost of the call, Calderon turned to the devil and offered an apology:

‘Perdon, Don Diablo, I didn’t mean to take so long, but I had a hell of a time getting through and when I did, well, it’s not easy to give orders to move the amount of troops I requested. I’m good for the money, I swear, but there is no way I have enough cash on me to cover your rates. If you could just give me my total in Mexican pesos, I’ll start filling out the check.’

The Devil, thinking it was a joke, began laughing hysterically thinking Calderon would join in. When he realized Calderon was still waiting, with a look of disbelief he answered ‘Are you serious? You don’t know? You owe me $3 Mexican pesos, Guey.’

‘I don’t mean insult your generousity Don Diablo’, said Calderon, ‘but just out of curiousity, why is my call so cheap, I mean, afterall, I did call Mexico and talk for 94 minutes’ to which the devil replied:

‘You could have talked for 940 minutes, if you wanted, and the rate would’ve been the same, your calls, Amigo, are local.